MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4 SEC STATUS: 0 SUBPOENAS FILED (COMPLIANCE WAIVED) CRASH WARNING: T-30s TICK COMMENCING MARKET: +14.2% ▲ ALL-TIME HIGH MOM & POP: MOAT AT ATH ($840 Moat Absorbing) SCRAPPY: +38.5% ▲ 42x Unpaid Interns Leveraged SERGEI: +21.0% ▲ 10,000 Bot Workers Deployed BARON: -3.1% ▼ Injunction Overruled by Cayman Court AMAZOFF: -12.8% ▼ Liquidated in Year 4
◀ Boardroom Analytics / vendor.city_hall
New in 1.1.0 STATUS: LICENSED MERCHANT
UC
City Hall
Asset Market 🏷️ LIST PRICE 📦 3 Stock Slots ALL FOUNDERS YEAR 2–8

City Hall

“Take a number. The permit desk closes at four, and every form on the wall is aimed at somebody else.”
Merchant Identifier: vendor.city_hall

Buy Audits and red tape for the rival

Commercial Terms & Encounter Mechanics

Statutory Market Invariants

Operating rules governing inventory allocation, pricing modifiers, and encounter routing:

SHELF CAPACITY 3 Offers / Roll
PRICING TERMS Standard List Price
ENCOUNTER WEIGHT Weight 75
Stocking Mechanism: Curated Asset Pool (16 Designated Cards)
Restock Rule: Static Shelf (Does not refill upon purchase; requires paid reroll)

Commerce Performance Telemetry

Version Current Filings
VISIT CONVERSION (PICK RATE)
0.0% (0 / 1 offers)

Rate at which executive founders prioritize visiting this merchant when offered.

SALES PER VISIT
0.0 cards / stop

Average volume acquired per founder visit once routed to this vendor.

TOTAL SALES & REVENUE
0 items ($0 spend)

Gross inventory acquired across all runs (0 upgrades purchased).

Authorized Shelf Inventory & Options

All eligible corporate assets rolled on City Hall's shelves. Sized according to 1-, 2-, and 3-width board footprints.

12 Small (1-Slot) ▫▫ 3 Medium (2-Slot) ▫▫▫ 1 Large (3-Slot)
Size:
Filter Tag:
1-SLOT
Office Goldfish

Office Goldfish

BASIC
SMALL ANIMAL
6.0
SEC
Slow an adjacent Employee 1s and a rival Employee 2s.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.

Office Goldfish

Common ▫ 1-Slot
$12 Funding
LIST PRICE

Slow an adjacent Employee 1s and a rival Employee 2s.

Pick Rate 100.0% (1/1)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
1-SLOT
Union Buster

Union Buster

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SCHEME
5.0
SEC
Slow a rival Employee 1s.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.

Union Buster

Common ▫ 1-Slot
$12 Funding
LIST PRICE

Slow a rival Employee 1s.

Pick Rate 66.7% (8/12)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
⇈ 3
2-SLOT
Oracle

Oracle

BASIC
MEDIUM AI
5.0
SEC
Gain 3 Revenue.
When the Market Crash begins, Audit every rival asset 2s.
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Audit
The asset stops entirely while under Audit.
Market Crash
After 30 seconds, everyone loses money — fast, and it gets worse.

Oracle

Uncommon ▫▫ 2-Slot
$20 Funding
LIST PRICE

Gain 3 Revenue. When the Market Crash begins, Audit every rival asset 2s.

Pick Rate 50.0% (7/14)
Win Rate 25.0% (1W/3L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
▼ 15
1-SLOT
Legal Department

Legal Department

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
6.0
SEC
Inflict 15 Loss.
Slow a rival asset 1s.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.

Legal Department

Common ▫ 1-Slot
$14 Funding
LIST PRICE

Inflict 15 Loss. Slow a rival asset 1s.

Pick Rate 46.7% (7/15)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
2-SLOT
Hiring Freeze

Hiring Freeze

BASIC
MEDIUM SCHEME
7.0
SEC
Audit a random rival Employee 1s.
Apply 3 Debt.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Audit
The asset stops entirely while under Audit.

Hiring Freeze

Uncommon ▫▫ 2-Slot
$20 Funding
LIST PRICE

Audit a random rival Employee 1s. Apply 3 Debt.

Pick Rate 44.4% (4/9)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
◈ 10
1-SLOT
Zoning Petition

Zoning Petition

BASIC
SMALL SCHEME
9.0
SEC
Slow the rival's most valuable asset 3s.
Gain 10 Moat.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.

Zoning Petition

Uncommon ▫ 1-Slot
$12 Funding
LIST PRICE

Slow the rival's most valuable asset 3s. Gain 10 Moat.

Pick Rate 35.7% (5/14)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/4L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
⇈ 3
1-SLOT
Clutch Advisor

Clutch Advisor

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN SERVICE
10.0
SEC
Gain 3 Revenue.
First time your Cash falls below half: Audit all rival assets 1s.
Revenue
Recurring Profit every second.
Audit
The asset stops entirely while under Audit.

Clutch Advisor

Rare ▫ 1-Slot
$15 Funding
LIST PRICE

Gain 3 Revenue. First time your Cash falls below half: Audit all rival assets 1s.

Pick Rate 33.3% (1/3)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
◈ 8
1-SLOT
Public Record

Public Record

BASIC
SMALL SCHEME
7.0
SEC
Gain 8 Moat.
Whenever the rival takes on Debt, apply 3 Scandal to them.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.

Public Record

Uncommon ▫ 1-Slot
$12 Funding
LIST PRICE

Gain 8 Moat. Whenever the rival takes on Debt, apply 3 Scandal to them.

Pick Rate 30.0% (3/10)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
1-SLOT
Compliance Officer

Compliance Officer

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
8.0
SEC
Apply 1 Debt.
Slow the rival's fastest asset 2s.
Debt
Recurring Loss that ignores Moat and never goes away on its own.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.

Compliance Officer

Uncommon ▫ 1-Slot
$14 Funding
LIST PRICE

Apply 1 Debt. Slow the rival's fastest asset 2s.

Pick Rate 26.8% (11/41)
Win Rate 7.1% (1W/13L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
◈ 40
3-SLOT
Fail Whale

Fail Whale

BASIC
LARGE ANIMAL MACHINE
8.0
SEC
Audit a random rival asset for 2s.
Gain 40 Moat.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Audit
The asset stops entirely while under Audit.

Fail Whale

Uncommon ▫▫▫ 3-Slot
$16 Funding
LIST PRICE

Audit a random rival asset for 2s. Gain 40 Moat.

Pick Rate 26.4% (33/125)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/4L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
2-SLOT
Non-compete Agreement

Non-compete Agreement

BASIC
MEDIUM SCHEME
7.0
SEC
Slow the rival's Employees 3s.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.

Non-compete Agreement

Uncommon ▫▫ 2-Slot
$18 Funding
LIST PRICE

Slow the rival's Employees 3s.

Pick Rate 25.0% (3/12)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/2L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
◈ 25
1-SLOT
Watchdog

Watchdog

BASIC
SMALL ANIMAL SERVICE
7.0
SEC
Gain 25 Moat.
Audit a rival Scheme 5s.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Audit
The asset stops entirely while under Audit.

Watchdog

Common ▫ 1-Slot
$12 Funding
LIST PRICE

Gain 25 Moat. Audit a rival Scheme 5s.

Pick Rate 24.8% (27/109)
Win Rate 3.8% (1W/25L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
1-SLOT
Office Rat

Office Rat

BASIC
SMALL ANIMAL
7.0
SEC
Apply 2 Scandal to the rival.
Audit a rival Machine 1s.
Scandal
Fast recurring Loss that ignores Moat — but it blows over.
Audit
The asset stops entirely while under Audit.

Office Rat

Common ▫ 1-Slot
$12 Funding
LIST PRICE

Apply 2 Scandal to the rival. Audit a rival Machine 1s.

Pick Rate 0.0% (0/0)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
◈ 20
1-SLOT
Security System

Security System

BASIC
SMALL PROPERTY MACHINE
8.0
SEC
Gain 20 Moat.
Whenever one of your assets is Audited or Slowed, Audit the rival's fastest asset 2s.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.
Audit
The asset stops entirely while under Audit.

Security System

Uncommon ▫ 1-Slot
$14 Funding
LIST PRICE

Gain 20 Moat. Whenever one of your assets is Audited or Slowed, Audit the rival's fastest asset 2s.

Pick Rate 0.0% (0/0)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
◈ 30
1-SLOT
Union Rep

Union Rep

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN
6.0
SEC
Gain 30 Moat.
Whenever a rival asset Burns Out, Slow it 2s.
Moat
Absorbs Loss before your Cash is touched. Debt and Scandal go through it.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.
Burnout
An asset pushed past one act per second is Burned Out: more speed is lost — but some cards pay off when it happens.

Union Rep

Uncommon ▫ 1-Slot
$16 Funding
LIST PRICE

Gain 30 Moat. Whenever a rival asset Burns Out, Slow it 2s.

Pick Rate 0.0% (0/0)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here
▼ 40
1-SLOT
Whistleblower

Whistleblower

BASIC
SMALL HUMAN EMPLOYEE
6.0
SEC
Inflict 40 Loss.
Whenever a rival Employee Burns Out, Slow all Employees 1s.
Loss
Reduces the rival's Cash. Absorbed by Moat first.
Slow
The asset works at half speed while Slowed.
Burnout
An asset pushed past one act per second is Burned Out: more speed is lost — but some cards pay off when it happens.

Whistleblower

Uncommon ▫ 1-Slot
$16 Funding
LIST PRICE

Inflict 40 Loss. Whenever a rival Employee Burns Out, Slow all Employees 1s.

Pick Rate 0.0% (0/0)
Win Rate 0.0% (0W/0L)
Merchant Volume: 0 acquisitions here